Wednesday, August 16, 2006

This is soooooo true

Hello all, it seems that my brain wouldn't come up with new topics this week but fear not my friends, because here comes some equations (Don't worry, it's not maths) :P

ROMANCE MATHEMATICS

Smart man + smart woman = romance
Smart man + dumb woman = affair
Dumb man + smart woman = marriage
Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy


OFFICE ARITHMETIC

Smart boss + smart employee = profit
Smart boss + dumb employee = production
Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion
Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime


GENERAL EQUATIONS & STATISTICS


A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.

A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.

A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.

A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

HAPPINESS


To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little.

To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.

LONGEVITY


Married men live longer than single men do, but married men are a lot more willing to die.

PROPENSITY TO CHANGE


A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.

A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, and she does.

DISCUSSION TECHNIQUE


A woman has the last word in any argument.

Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.

HOW TO STOP PEOPLE FROM BUGGING YOU ABOUT GETTING MARRIED


Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poking me in the ribs and cackling, telling me, "You're next." They stopped after I started doing the same thing to them at funerals.

3 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

The last one just cracked me up, and it's almost 2 in the morning (obviously, I'm not married!)

1:57 AM

 
Blogger Um Naief said...

The last one really makes me laugh! Can you imagine actually doing that! I think it would be sooo funny but oh so terribly bad! ;) The devil in me wants to do it! ;)

12:11 PM

 
Blogger Munther said...

Yeah this was my favorite too ! :D I can't even dream of doing this to an old family member ! It might work anywhere in the world but here ? I'd have my nick snapped ! :D Glad you two enjoyed the equations ;) :P

12:30 PM

 

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