Men are defective women !

From what I've gathered from my friendships with the opposite gender, previous relationships and the stories I hear from my married mates, I came to a certain conclusion ! We men generally believe that we are “different” from women "erm well done Freud", whereas women generally believe that us men are “defective” women.

Most gender related differences seems to be due to us males preferring to categorize thoughts while women think everything is somehow connected. Here are some phrases you will NEVER hear from women:

“I didn’t wrap your present because you’d just throw away the wrapping anyway.”

“Let’s skip Valentine’s Day this year so we don’t miss Prison Break.”

“Mohammed just died? Huh. What’s for dinner?”

No guy would ever say those things around a women either, but not because he isn’t thinking them. We guys have learned how to blend in and talk like women when it’s necessary. It feels like being a German spy during World War II and you’re always worried someone will ask you a question about the Americans.

If you’re male you have to do a lot of internal editing before you let anything come out of your mouth. The best way to filter is to ask yourself how a woman would react to what you’re about to say. Here’s a little test to see if you know how this works.

Suppose a male sees a car that’s an ugly green "Like the Honda CRXs over here" and he goes “That is one ugly car!” to his friend. Now, match the friend’s gender with the most likely response:

A. “Holy $%#*&, that color is just wrong for a car.”

B. Silence, while thinking “He hates my green sweater.”